On Saturday July 10 at approximately at 7:00pm John den Boer will be having a barbecue to celebrate his recent engagement or his birthday (it doesn't matter which, both are pretty cool). If you're of the opinion that John isn't a bad shit then come on down to 241 Bonaventure Drive, but please give advanced warning.
Anyhow, John's residence is at the corner of Clifton Downs and Bonaventure across from Park formerly known as Brown which now bears the name of some dead alderman. Let's say that you're driving your car northwards at approximately 60 km/h down Upper Paradise from Rymal Road you would drive past such landmarks as the perpetually pacing adolescent Little Caesar's sandwich board people, Mac's, the bridge over the Linc, and maybe even that ridiculously fat guy who wears sweat pants up to his chest. Now as your going over the bridge you'll notice that there's stoplights up ahead. You'll have to turn right onto Hadeland there and then follow that until the first stop sign where you turn right and then, and I hope this isn't too confusing, a quick left at the next stop sign. You can actually make a slow left if you really want to as you'll still reach John's house, but a quick left is preferable.
Now, let's say that you're driving your car southwards at approximately 55 km/hr down Garth from Mohawk. You'll have to turn right on Limeridge Road and follow that until you reach Bonaventure. Now, don't go straight because that's Limeridge Court and that's a dead end. No, you have to turn left on Bonaventure and follow that road. Hopefully the sharp bend in the road won't throw you off, as some people signal around that corner - something which is completely unnecessary.
If the directions are confusing I aks you not to worry as they're probably wrong anyways.