tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58317462024-03-07T19:47:09.558-05:00BoerishbwoyRefreshing . . .John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.comBlogger487125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-12305664513251398762020-02-21T10:53:00.002-05:002020-02-25T08:57:57.764-05:00Review: My First Trucks and Diggers: Let's Get Driving!
My son would give this book five stars if he understood the concept of a rating system or had any kind of number sense beyond the numbers one and two. I give this book a solid one star, based on the number of times I have had to read this nightmare of a book. This averages out to four stars, because I have no idea how averages work.
The challenge when reading this book is that the text is all Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-41961377983946832572019-04-17T10:27:00.002-04:002019-04-17T10:37:45.999-04:00Rafael den Boer: Corrections and AddendumsBoerishbwoy recently published a product review of Rafael den Boer. There have been several developments in the last six months which have forced us to issue the following corrections and addendums:
• Although the utility of the product still remains in question and while, in fact, the production of soiled diapers and drool has actually increased, it has been observed that the product has Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-32239599502639411952018-10-26T13:44:00.000-04:002018-10-26T13:44:33.914-04:00Product Review: Rafael den Boer
Utility: 2/10
The product does not appear very useful. After more
than a week of ownership, the product has not produced anything beyond soiled
diapers and a stream of saliva. Rather than generating income, the product
seems to require constant upgrades, attention, and assorted repair and
maintenance costs.
Aesthetics: 10/10.
Product has full head of hair, big dark brown eyes, Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-57244041718505823922018-05-11T09:02:00.000-04:002018-05-11T14:56:11.575-04:00Avocado Indulgence, Entitled Techno-brats Living Among UsHow about those Millennials with their techno-screens, basement apartments, and participation medals? Here are ten reasons why Millennials are the worst generation of all the generations that have existed since the dawn of life:
1) Millennials are the most selfish generation of all time because they take selfies. If you look closely, the word self is right there at the beginning of the Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-3481139950388036602018-05-04T11:36:00.001-04:002018-05-04T11:36:47.550-04:00"You can always tell a government worker by the total vacancy which occupies the space where most other people have faces."
- Ignatius C. ReillyJohnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-51129564806179456442018-05-01T13:48:00.002-04:002018-05-01T13:52:35.010-04:00Les Miserables: A Review What can I write about this book that has not already been written by countless readers before me? What possible insight could I have that some academic has not already built up and then deconstructed (because that's what academics do, ammiright?) in a much finer and more eloquent manner than I could possibly even attempt?
The rich characters, the vibrant story-telling, the variousJohnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-76470952781271581972018-04-16T11:06:00.000-04:002018-04-16T11:11:19.136-04:00The Romancing of Gladys McCormickWeek 1
Eddie Larocque had been going to Burrwood United Church for over thirty-five years, and he had been sitting in the same pew for at least thirty-four of those years. The pew, a gleaming high-backed oak number just like all the others, was in row five on the leftmost side of the sanctuary. He had been going to Burrwood United for more than thirty-five years, but it was not until that Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-46268105153286019092018-04-10T09:24:00.000-04:002018-04-10T09:28:21.014-04:00The Great Cities of History: A Review of John Julius Norwich's Book
• I was eager to read this book, as I knew for a fact
that my hometown of Hamilton "the Hammer" Ontario would be making an
appearance.
• I was hoping that I would learn the correct
pronunciation of Thebes from this book. I did not. I did, however, learn that
persons from Thebes are referred to as Thebans.
• I still do not know how to pronounce Thebans.
• This book has a lot of great Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-12715048648734210002018-03-27T08:24:00.001-04:002018-03-27T08:29:44.576-04:00Eat Food and Don't Stare Into the SunNot too long ago, a report surfaced of a breatharian couple who claims to be able to survive on nothing but “the cosmic energy of the universe.” Any food they do eat, they insist, is just to enjoy the taste or to simply accede to social conventions. “Oh, this bit of celery? I’m only eating it because I’m at this raging party and it’s really the thing to do in such a situation.”
A bite of Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-48170166836900901302018-03-22T09:01:00.000-04:002018-03-22T09:06:35.989-04:00Six of Crows More Like Pricks and Schmoes, Ammiright?Six of Crows is a book about a gang of teenagers who need to break into a well-guarded prison in order to break out and kidnap some guy who invented a magical super drug that imbues magic users with extreme powers like some kind of supersonic heroin.
I did not realize that this was Young Adult fiction when I started reading it. Through my powers of superior deduction I soon figured it out.Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-5246369937815406962018-03-20T11:17:00.001-04:002018-03-20T11:30:14.723-04:00Moby Dick, the Least Amount of Plot in the Most Amount of Words?How was your day, Ishmael?
Ishmael begins an exposition on exactly what a day is, making a lengthy reference to the Babylonian origins of the twenty four hour day. Next, he begins a lecture on the number twenty-four and the use of the number six as a base by the ancient Babylonians. The many manifestations of the number six throughout history are described at length. Goliath of Gath had six Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-4060196992914543272018-03-13T12:01:00.000-04:002018-03-13T12:01:19.895-04:00You Won’t Believe What John Posted on His Blog!
It’s a shoe.
Dear reader, you are doubtlessly triumphantly crowing to
yourself right now that, yes, you do indeed believe that John posted this to
his blog. There is nothing outrageous about this post and it in no way
whatsoever threatens to even approach the limits of your credulity.
Ah, but allow me the chance to open your eyes to the
devious little trick that has just been Johnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16664550754627922691noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-54440247713311911272018-03-07T09:09:00.000-05:002018-03-07T09:12:29.035-05:00Wuthering Heights: A Review
Wuthering Heights
So today I will be reviewing a classic of English
literature: Emily Brönte’s Wuthering Heights. As it has been some time since I
have written anything in this blog, I will open by leaning on that old standby
that I formerly employed in my high school essays: the dictionary.
The Webster’s dictionary defines wuthering as an
intransitive verb meaning “to blow with a dull John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-87221032215617242742013-02-05T16:18:00.003-05:002013-02-05T16:18:51.778-05:00Dear Hairline,
While I can appreciate your defiance in the face of my inevitable baldness, I must ask you to please recede in a more orderly fashion. Rather than retreating in a continuous line up my scalp as normal people’s receding hairlines would do, you have decided to stand your ground. While I do have a certain amount of admiration for your bravery, it is, nevertheless, quite foolish for John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-75032433709169988692012-12-20T11:41:00.001-05:002012-12-20T11:42:46.375-05:00To the Hole in My Pocket,
You swallow so many things, yet you have no digestive tract, no stomach, nothing with which to hold that which you consume. You will never be sated by the many coins that you have consumed in the midst of your endless, sisyphean hunger. This is your curse in life, to always eat but never be satisfied, to be ever consuming but never retaining.
Basically, I think you should give up John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-88676971980550023512012-12-18T12:00:00.000-05:002012-12-18T12:00:06.841-05:00To the gentleman who cut me off on the way into the parking garage,
I am glad that I was able to facilitate speedy access to the parking area for you. I understand that you, no doubt, had very important things to do — things that were much more important than anything I might have had to do. The speed with which you took advantage of my act of opening the garage door leads me to the conclusion that you are a very august person, for whom ordinary rules John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-26684311473063135782012-12-17T12:30:00.001-05:002012-12-17T12:56:25.550-05:00Gezellig<!--[if gte mso 9]>
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John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-8668501201206498242012-12-11T14:40:00.003-05:002012-12-11T14:43:17.935-05:00Update<!--[if gte mso 9]>
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John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-63266432169315761982012-12-07T15:10:00.002-05:002012-12-07T15:12:12.335-05:00Fantasy Soccer Graph
Graph Plotting Effort Invested in Fantasy Soccer Versus Score Outcomes Per Week (Effort Measured in Units of Thought)
John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-18118054803457396552012-12-06T12:18:00.004-05:002012-12-06T12:41:49.524-05:00The Ox-Bow IncidentI picked this book up on a whim for 35 cents at a used bookstore in Maine.
By
far, this is the best 35 cents that I have ever spent in my life. Not
knowing anything about the book, I was expecting a sort of rough Western
story about how a hero was able to face off against a lynch mob. This
book delivers so much more than that. The exploration of mob
psychology, authoritarianism, and the John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-38008469158913430962012-05-17T12:44:00.001-04:002012-05-17T12:44:56.879-04:00This new layout is confusing me. I am confused.
That is all.John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-56119525886677216252012-05-10T11:33:00.000-04:002012-05-10T11:33:19.047-04:00Skit for Oma's BirthdayMy Oma recently turned 90, and the family got together to celebrate her life. One of our family's Christmas traditions is to prepare a program in which various family members share poems, songs, skits, readings, and games. We often groan about the program, but it is really a great tradition. We had a program for Oma's birthday as well, and I prepared one of my silly skits for John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-86029925582281975112012-05-07T14:02:00.003-04:002012-05-07T14:05:15.420-04:00A few months ago, I finished reading I am Legend, a book by Richard Matheson that was made into a blockbuster film starring Will Smith. I noticed a few small differences between the book and the film:
~ Robert Neville isn't a famous army scientist in the book, he's a veteran and blue collar veteran who knows how to use the library.
~ There is no Bob Marley in the book, just classical John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-27340150276984811232012-01-31T15:10:00.001-05:002012-01-31T15:11:34.486-05:00Dear sir, I myself have found myself frustrated more than once by that particular door at the Rideau Shopping Centre. As it is the rightmost door in its section, practical experience dictates that it should swing open on the side closest to the door on its left. Nevertheless, this door swings open on the side closest to the wall. I have done the same thing as you, sir – pushing on the door’s John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5831746.post-32815091453651184992012-01-19T13:00:00.001-05:002012-01-19T13:00:28.144-05:00The 1812 Bicentennial2012 marks the bicentennial anniversary of the outbreak of the War of 1812. Journalists on both sides of the border seem to be busy with the academic equivalent of a hip hop feud: Who won the war? Whose heroes were best? Was Isaac Brock just a nancy-pants?While Americans and Canadians puff up their chests and argue over whether Betsy Doyle or Laura Secord was more John den Boerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16545073858021858200noreply@blogger.com5